understandingly.
"Oh, no," said Rube. "But that's not the reason. The real reason is ...
Well, maybe it's because that was my first club. I don't know. Whatever
the reason, though, it was wonderful to be a Giant back then.

"Take Mr. McGraw, for example. What a great man he was! The finest and
grandest man I ever met! He loved his players and his players loved him.
Of course, he wouldn't stand for any nonsense. You had to live up to the
rules and regulations of the New York Giants, and when he laid down the
law you'd better abide by it!

"I'll never forget one day we were playing Pittsburgh, and it was Red
Murray's turn to bat, with the score tied in the ninth inning. There was
a man on second with none out. Murray came over to McGraw--I was sitting
next to McGraw on the bench--and he said, 'What do you want me to do,
Mac?'

"'What do I want you to do?' McGraw said. 'What are you doing in the
National League? There's the winning run on second base and no one out.
What would you do if you were the manager?'

"'I'd sacrifice the man to third,' Murray said.

"'Well,' McGraw said, 'that's exactly what I want you to do.'

"So Murray went up to the plate to bunt. After he got to the batter's
box, though, he backed out and looked over at McGraw again.

"McGraw poked his elbow in my ribs. 'Look at that so-and-so,' he said.
'He told me what he should do, and I told him what he should do, and now
he's undecided. I'll bet he forgot from the bench to the plate.'

"Now, in those days--and I guess it's the same now--when a man was up
there to bunt, the pitcher would try to keep the ball high and tight.
Well, it so happened that Red was a high-ball hitter. Howie Camnitz was
pitching for Pittsburgh. He wound up and in came the ball, shoulder
high. Murray took a terrific cut at it and the ball went over the
left-field fence. It was a home run and the game was over.

"Back in the clubhouse, Murray was as happy as a lark. He was first into
the showers, and out boomed his wonderful Irish tenor, singing _My Wild
Irish Rose_. When he came out of the shower, still singing, McGraw
walked over and tapped him on the shoulder. All of us were watching out
of the corner of our eyes, because we knew The Little Round Man--that's
what we used to call McGraw--wouldn't let this one go by without saying
_something_.

"'Murray,' McGraw said. 'What did I tell you to do?'

"'You told me to bunt,' Murray said, not looking quite so happy anymore.
'But you know what happened, Mac. Camnitz put one right in my gut, so I
cow-tailed it.'

"'Where did you say he put it?' asked McGraw.

"'Right in my gut,' Murray says again.

"'Well,' said McGraw, I'm fining you a hundred dollars, and you can try
putting that right in your gut, too!' And off he went.

"Oh, God! I never laughed so much in my life! Murray never did live that
down. Years later something would happen and we'd yell to Murray, 'Hey
Red, is that right in your gut?'

"There were a lot of grand guys on that club: Christy Mathewson and
Chief Meyers, Larry Doyle and Fred Snodgrass, Al Bridwell and Bugs
Raymond. Bugs Raymond! Ah, yes! What a terrific spitball pitcher he was.
Bugs drank a lot, you know, and sometimes it seemed like the more he
drank the better he pitched. They used to say that he didn't spit on the
ball: he blew his breath on it, and the ball would come up drunk.

"Actually, there was very little drinking in baseball in those days.
It's a shame that drinking will become more and more commonplace in
American sports with the passage of time. I have seen it, and it is sad.
Myself, I've never smoked or took a drink in my life. I always said you
can't burn the candle at both ends. You want to be a ballplayer, be a
ballplayer. If you want to go out and carouse and chase around, do that.
But you can't do them both at once.

"Of course," continued Rube Marquard's shadow, 'when we were on the
road, we had a nightly eleven o'clock bed check. At eleven o'clock we
all had to be in our rooms and the trainer would come around and check
us off. We'd usually have a whole floor in a hotel and we'd be two to a
room. I always roomed with Matty all the while I was on the Giants. What
a grand guy he was! The door would be wide open at eleven o'clock and
the trainer would come by with a board with all the names on it. He'd
poke his head in: Mathewson, Marquard, check. And lock the door. Next
room, check, lock the door.

"As far as I was concerned, I never drank a drop even when I was in show
business. In 1912 I made a movie with Alice Joyce and Maurice Costello,
and then I was in vaudeville for three years, Blossom Seeley and I.
That's when she was my wife. It didn't work out, though. I asked her to
quit the stage. I told her I could give her everything she wanted.

"'No,' she told me. 'Show business is show business.'

"'Well,' I said, 'baseball is mine.' So we parted."

"You mentioned that you were with the Giants for seven years, and then
the Dodgers for five, did you not? How did it feel when you were traded
from the Giants to the Dodgers?" asked Elephant.

"Well," said the shadow, "not too bad. See, I traded myself. I didn't
seem to be able to get going in 1915 after I pitched that no-hitter
early in April, and late in the season McGraw started riding me. That
was a very bad year for the Giants, you know. We were favored to win the
pennant, and instead we wound up last. So McGraw wasn't very happy.
After I had taken about as much riding as I could stand, I asked him to
trade me if he thought I was so bad.

"'Who would take you?' he said to me.

"'What do you mean?' I asked. 'I can still lick any club in the league.'
And I could, too! Heck, I wasn't even twenty-six years old then.

"'Lick any club in the league?' scoffed McGraw. 'You couldn't lick a
postage stamp!'

"'Give me a chance to trade myself, then,' I suggested. 'What would you
sell me for?'

"'Seven thousand five hundred bills,' he answered.

"'Okay,' I said. 'Can I use your phone?'

"'Sure,' he said.

"We were both pretty mad at that point, so I got 'hold of the operator
and asked her to get me Wilbert Robinson, manager of the Brooklyn club.
You see, Robbie--that's what we called him--had been a coach with us for
years before he became the Dodger manager in 1914. After a while, she
got Robbie on the phone.

"'Hello?' he says.

"'How are you, Robbie?' I asked.

"Fine,' he said. 'Who is this?'

"Now, I had to handle this conversation very carefully. My whole world
depended on it. 'How would you like to have a good left-handed pitcher?'
I said in a jovial tone.

"I'd love it,' he said. 'Who is this? Who's the man? Who are you going
to recommend?'

"I then dropped the clincher. 'I'm going to recommend myself,' I told
him.

"'Who are you?' he repeated.

"'Rube Marquard,' I said, trying to sound impressive.

"'Oh,' Robbie said. 'What are you kidding around for, Rube? I have to go
out on the field and I don't have time to fool around.'

"'No,' I told him, 'I'm serious! McGraw is right here and he says he'll
sell me for seven thousand five hundred buckaroos! Do you want to talk
to him?'

"'Of course I do,' Robbie said. And right then and there I was traded
from the Giants to the Dodgers.

"And, of course, we--the Dodgers, that is--won the pennant the next
year, and I had one of the best years I ever had. I think I had an
earned run average of about one and a half in 1916. And then we won the
pennant again in 1920. So everything worked out pretty well.

"One day when I was pitching for Brooklyn, I pitched the first game of a
double-header against Boston and beat them, one to zip! I was in the
clubhouse during the second game, taking off my uniform, when the
clubhouse boy came in. 'Rube,' he said to me, 'there's an elderly
gentleman outside who wants to see you. He says he's your father from
Cleveland.

"'He is not my father,' I said. 'My father wouldn't go across the street
to see me. But you go out and get his autograph book and bring it in,
and I'll autograph it for him.'

"But instead of bringing in the book, he brought in my Dad. And we were
both delighted to see one another.

"'Boy,' said my father to me, 'you sure are a hardhead. You know I
didn't mean what I said ten years ago.'

"'What about you, Dad?' I said. 'You're as stubborn as I am. I thought
you never wanted to see me again. I thought you meant it.'

"'Of course I didn't,' he said.

"After we talked a while, I said, 'Did you see the game today?'

"'Yes,' he said, 'I did.'

"'Where were you sitting?' I asked him.

"'Well, you know the man who wears that funny thing on his face?'

"'You mean the mask? The catcher?' I said.

"'I guess so,' my father said with a smile. 'Well, anyway, I was halfway
between him and the number one--you know, where they run right after
they hit the ball?'

"'You mean first base?' I asked.

"'I don't know,' he said. 'I don't know what they call it. I was sitting
in the middle there.'

"'How many ball games have you seen since I became a ballplayer, Dad?' I
wanted to know.

"'This is the first one,' he said.

"Well, he stayed in New York with me for a few weeks, and we had a
great time. Finally, he had to go back to Cleveland. After he'd left,
the newspapers heard about my Dad and they wanted to know his address
back home. So I gave it to them, and doggone if they didn't send
reporters and photographers to Cleveland to interview him.

"They took his picture and asked him a lot of questions. One of the
things they asked him was whether he had ever played very much baseball
himself.

"'Oh,' he told them, 'of course I did, when I was younger. I used to
love to play baseball. I used to be a pitcher, just like my son
Richard--I mean, like my son Rube.'

"'Are you proud of your son?' they asked him.

"'I certainly am,' Dad said. 'Why shouldn't I be? He's a great baseball
player, isn't he?'"

The group of Ozites was silent for a few moments as the Forest Monster
carried them along toward Yoraitia. The large pachyderm could feel a
tear welling up in his left eye, and he brushed it away with his trunk.




CHAPTER 15

THE RESTORATION OF THE LUNECHIEN FOREST OF OZ


The little party arrived in Yoraitia in a short time. When they got
there, it looked like as happy a township as any other in the Marvelous
Land of Oz.

"I knew there could not be any really serious drought in our fairyland,"
said Elephant happily. "After all, Oz is always pleasant and lovely.
Lurliné's enchantment has always seen to that."

"I thought that Lurliné was only a character from an ancient legend,"
scowled the Forest Monster. "In any event, I was not created by any
Fairy enchantment. I know, for I was created by two prominent Wicked
Witches."

"And I was hatched out of an egg just like any other hoot-owl," replied
Lisa. "But that doesn't prove anything. In any event, Glinda the Good
said there was a drought happening here. But clearly she was mistaken. I
don't think droughts are natural in any part of Oz, anyway."

"They aren't," agreed Ozma. "But Glinda would not have told me a lie.
She must have believed there was one here."

"I think maybe she was right," said Tweaty. "Look here. I see that this
tree was only watered recently. See? It looks like it has been leaning
over since ... well, since at least last Tuesday at around three
o'clock. Before that, I fear it was left dry for several weeks."

"Tweaty's right," agreed Nibbles. "I can see it starting to straighten
up even as I look at it!"

"Then how," began Elephant, "did it ... Oh, I think I know."

"Of course!" added Lisa. "Glinda has already been here. She has already
determined the source of the problem and fixed it!"

As she spoke, she noticed out of the corner of her left eye that another
personage had joined the group.

"Glinda!" said Ozma, instantly recognizing the newcomer.

"Your Majesty," replied Glinda with a loving smile. "I see that you have
come to see that the Yoraitians have been provided for. It was really
very simple. You see, a tribe of giant polka-dot beavers had just
claimed a territory a few miles up the river. It is natural for
polka-dot beavers to build dams, and they had no awareness that theirs
was blocking off the water supply of any inhabited towns. Once they
found out, they were happy to remedy the situation. Now they are happily
helping Yoraitia to better utilize its water supply. They are really
very intelligent animals, and they have acknowledged you as their Queen,
too."

"I am very pleased," said the youthful ruler.

"But that is not why we are here," put in Lisa quickly. "The Queen needs
her Anmars. It is the only way that she can save the residents of the
Lunechien Forest."

"The Lunechien Forest?" echoed the Good Witch. "Why, my goodness! What
is wrong with the Lunechien Forest? The last I read of it in my Great
Book of Records, it was a very happy land of elephants and unicorns and
other carefree creatures."

"Indeed it was," said the Forest Monster gravely. "But I'm afraid its
hardships are all my fault. In my thirst for power, I drained many of
the small, unfortunate beasts of all their strengths and abilities. I
have since seen the error of my ways, and I repent of my unOzlike
actions. I had been so blinded by my resentment toward the Cowardly Lion
that I was not even thinking about how much wickedness I was doing. The
little Princess-Queen of Oz has forgiven me already. I am willing to do
whatever I can to make restitution for my acts. I know that you are also
a Queen and that you are one of Ozma's closest advisors. If you wish me
banished from all Oz once you have restored all of my poor victims, I
will accept the punishment without a murmur."

The shadow of Rube Marquard stood still and listened with a puzzled
expression on his face.

Ozma looked at Glinda. "The Forest Monster really has repented," she
said. "I saw the change with my own two eyes. He is willing to be
restored to the size of a natural spider so that all the others can have
what he took from them."

"Then it shall be done," agreed Glinda, handing Ozma the magical tool.

The Forest Monster carried the entire group--including Glinda--to the
famous Ozian forest. Instantly, he and Ozma gathered up the comatose
Lunechien animals and prepared to restore them to rights.

Glinda also lent a hand in the restoration process. It was not an easy
task, but in only a little more than fourteen hours the lush Lunechien
Forest was once again alive with the sounds of joyful birds and animals
milling about among the trees and bushes.

At the end of it all, the Forest Monster was as small as a typical
arachnid. Still, his tiny face was all smiles. Indeed, he was as happy
as a lark that the poor animals he had wronged could be righted again.
And, in fact, it has been recorded in Glinda's Great Book of Records
that not a single animal was overlooked during the restoration process.
All were brought back to their former care-free selves without
exception. Well, maybe one exception. Somehow, in all of the hubbub,
Tweaty was overlooked. He did not consider it politic to interrupt the
proceedings. After all, his fellow beasts had had a far worse
enchantment than he had. Of course it was uncomfortable to be a tiny
orange elephant. But how much worse to be completely without oneself. He
decided to wait until another time to ask to be restored. He felt that
it would be too much of a selfish act to ask Ozma or Glinda to take time
away from those who truly needed their help when he knew that he could
stand to be a small orange elephant for a little while longer.

The reunion of the Lunechien friends and families was a cause for
celebration throughout the Forest. A grand party was enjoyed by all, and
even the Cowardly Lion made another trip away from home to pay his
respects upon his fellow Foresters. The celebration went on 'til the wee
hours of the morning, when Ozma and Glinda had to get back to their
regular duties.

As for the residents of the Lunechien Forest, I am told that they are as
happy today as ever they were.

The former Forest Monster, now content to stay small and keep a low
profile, continues to this day to spin the most delicate and beautiful
webs you can imagine. And, indeed, he did have one of his creations
covered in gold, and gave it to Ozma as a sign of his submission to her
rule. She keeps it hanging over her bed in such a way that it is the
last thing she looks upon at night. The spider-creature has told me that
it functions as a dreamcatcher, preventing any unhappy dreams from ever
reaching her as she slumbers. The Sleep Fays, who once kept out these
bad dreams, have voiced their gratitude to the former Forest Monster for
this fine gift.

And now, it is time to say goodbye for a time to our happy friends in
Oz. But do not fret. Queen Ozma is always sending us new messages from
her glorious domain. I can assure you that it will not be so very long
at all before we will all be getting together again over another Oz
book. Until then, both of your grateful historians wish you as much
happiness as is again known in the Lunechien Forest of Oz.

THE END



A hard copy of this book is available at:
http://members.aol.com/LionCoward/home.html Also available is the
sequel: "The Magic Topaz of Oz"